Dramatic Intro

[Jane Lynch]
If you are under 30 and you're totally cool, then you absolutely know these guys
The Lonely Island and Michael Bolton!

[Jimmy Fallon]
From their album Incredibad, please welcome The Lonely Island!

Incredibad, this is just a blockbuster
"Jizz In My Pants," "Lazy Sunday," Narnia

[Kristen Schaal]
And here they are with Akon!

And the Nobel Peace Prize goes to... The Lonely Island, oh fuck yes!
The Lonely Island, they're the truth!

[Bobby Moynihan]
I like 'em because they speak for the people!

There's no way I’ll let my kids listen to it
They’re Satanists and they should be boycotted!
Around the country today, citizens burning any and all Lonely Island paraphernalia...

[Vanessa Bayer]
Now here they are, the first men to become pregnant!

[Jason Sudeikis]
I hereby declare The Lonely Island, the 47th president of these United States!

Tragedy today as The Lonely Island was beaten to death with their own dicks outside an all-male strip club
I see thousands of people, lining up to desecrate the body
Here on the street, I've seen at least 300 already defiling the corpses
And there are thousands more waiting
It looks like there's some movement
Oh my God, The Lonely Island are alive!
They're removing the fans from their various holes and heading back into the studio
The Lonely Island will continue to entertain us
After an experience like this, God only knows what they will create