Drag the River

Don't drink that much medicine
If you don't feel like throwing up
If you die with your head on my pillow
I'll consider myself blessed with luck

I could never dispose of your body
I want to save it in my home
In a room we reserved for
Our first baby when he's grown

I was out with my friends drinking
On the night that they found your body
With your backpack still on your shoulders
Holding everything that you stole from my family

I wish I had been at the river
When the search party had ceased
Surely not with the dogs in the forest
Or the missing persons police

With the sunscreen still in my nostrils
And your lipstick still drawn on my glasses
I'll apologize to your brother
He can have the books from all of my classes

The sounds from your back porch
Won't trip me up anymore
I just need to see the mess off
The clothes spilled on your bedroom floor