Don’t Destroy Yourself

Staring out into thin air again
At all the years I'll spend alone
I know it's comin' if not quickly
I always end up on my own

I gave up smoking, I gave up coffee
But I'm still not a bigger man
I still get swallowed by the petty
I'm still afraid to trust my friends

I'm still afraid to talk to strangers
I'm still afraid to make a joke
I still think I'm stupid and you hate it
Still can't be honest with my folks

I'm impatient and I'm pushy
I'm so stubborn and I know
If I try my hardest, I still won't change this
But I can hide it if I mope

Or I can still walk out the front door
I can still get on my bike
I can still take gulps of fresh air
When it's cooling down at night

Yeah I can run up to the river
And throw rocks along the top
And if they sink instead of skim the surface
The next day I still wake up

And take a second just to space out
And try to build a better home
Take my faults and say okay then
And call up everyone I know

Before I'm spending time alone