Divorce Me C.O.D.

Just bought me a great long ticket
I'm gonna use it at 4 PM
So you can call your secret love
And tell the news to him
You thought your little romance
Was on the strict Q.T
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D

I won't be 'round to hear you cry
I'm Texas bound, and bye and bye
You can reach me down in Dallas
General delivery
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D

There's gonna come a day, gal
When you'll be feelin' blue
You'll find that you can't pay your bills
With a little ole' I.O.U
That dynamite you're messin' with
May be T.N.T
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D

No need to fall
Down on your knees
'Cause I know all
My A.B.C.'s
I ain't no college 'fessor
I ain't got no P.H.D
But if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D