Dirtbag

The mission was written on a napkin in the kitchen
As I sat with my head in my hands
It was dark. I was drunk and the drink I was drinking
Gave me courage. I felt just like a man
I stepped outside for a smoke and I tried
To shake this awful feeling from my gut
I knew that someone would die that night
But I could not have known who or for what

So now I’m looking out on the water
And I’m hit with a wave of fear
When I see myself looking back rom across the river
I went inside and I got my gun
I could feel myself become undone
Before the light of day I would be dead
And I would be a killer

I am the worm on the hook
I am the oldest trick in the book
I am the whisper in your ear
I tell you what you need to hear

Earlier this morning before the sun was burning
I finally walked my way back home to bed
I keep thinking about my body on the outskirts of the city
Facedown in a pool of blood shot full of lead

And now the papers have their story
And on the TV screen before me
Is a news reporter standing at the scene
Quite squeamishly he speculates
As to how the stranger met his fate
And I pour myself a drink
To wash my conscience clean

I am the worm on the hook
I am the oldest trick in the book
I am the whisper in your ear
I tell you what you need to hear

I keep telling myself that I’m not this fragile body
And I say to myself that I’m not really dead
If I sleep it off, everything will be ok
I promise myself that I’m not really dead

They’ll never know why I did it
They’ll never know it was me
I’m as quiet as a clam at the bottom of the ocean
Everything comes to an ending
But I never thought it would be
The culmination of disrupted emotion

With justified indignation
I’ve severed all relation
I wash the blood away from the righteous hands
I cut my hair and shave my face
In admiration of the human race
Everything looks so nice with my head buried in the sand

I am the worm on the hook
I am the oldest trick in the book
I am the whisper in your ear
I tell you what you need to hear