Deep Routed

[Verse 1]
Something's stopping me
Something's shutting my mouth
Every time you say things first
I say them back but it doesn't count
Deep routed
But I don't remember why
Your hand on my lap made me shake
And on the train home I cried

[Chorus]
If it's what I dream I want
Why can't I let myself have it?
If it's what I dream I need
Why can't I let myself feel it?
If it's what I dream I want
Why can't I let myself like it?
If it's what I dream I need
Why am I so scared to keep it?

[Verse 2]
You asked if your hands were cold
I didn't notice 'til you pointed it out
I felt my brain turn and fold
And then it was all I could think about
I like your skin
Just not on mine
If I can't let you in
Am I wasting both of our time?

[Chorus]
If it's what I dream I want
Why can't I lеt myself have it?
If it's what I dream I need
Why can't I lеt myself feel it?
If it's what I dream I want
Why can't I let myself like it?
If it's what I dream I need
Why am I so scared to keep it?

[Bridge]
I'm only numb to the touch
That's not meant to cause pain
I don't recognize the feeling
So it just goes away
Am I scared of you?
Or am I scared that I'm not?
I'm lonely when you're here
I'm lonely a lot
Can't tell if I'm killing time
Or if this time is killing me
Convincing myself you're lying
And you hate me really
Is this how it is?
Is this who I am?
Guilty from a kiss
Rejecting your hand
It's always the same
Why can't I change?
Why can't I change?
Why can't I change?

[Chorus]
If it's what I dream I want
Why can't I let myself have it?
If it's what I dream I need
Why can't I let myself feel it?
If it's what I dream I want
Why can't I let myself like it?
If it's what I dream I need
Why am I so scared to keep it?

[Outro]
If it's what I dream I want
If it's what I dream I need
If it's what I dream I want
If it's what I dream I need