Dead inside

I'm dead inside, but have to say I'm fine. Men are forced to hide along side all the demons in their minds. I'm dead inside, contemplating suicide. I'm not afraid to die, I've been dead for such a long time

They say it's all in my head. And, I guess that makes sense, because, everything I feel, I keep in, because it's different for men. We talk about our feelings, we're called "oversensitive." We're asked to strike a balance, it doesn't exist. So we bottle everything up in our minds. We grow cold, dark and numb as we slowly die. You ever wonder why it's mostly men who commit suicide? We figure why not? We're already dead inside

I'm dead inside, but have to say I'm fine. Men are forced to hide along side all the demons in their minds. I'm dead inside, contemplating suicide. I'm not afraid to die, I've been dead for such a long time

They say it's all in my mind, and they're probably right, because everything I feel, it gets internalised. And, I could try to explain, but I know you'd push me away when you see the real reason I'm afraid. Because, if I let you in these walls and open up the gate, you'd see my castle is just one big cage, extra fortified, built that way by design, to protect the world on the outside from this monster that I've made. It wasn't on purpose, no, I didn't know. Just held on all my pain, held on to all my hate, and over time, it started to consolidate, until something in the darkness started to grow. I couldn't see through the fog of my dark thoughts. It's so congested, couldn't see something in the darkness that was manifesting, grew huge claws, and sharp teeth and sunk them in the deepest parts of me. And, now, it's got a hold on my neck and I can barely breathe. And you wonder why I ask God to come save me. I had no choice other than believe. You'd probably understand if you could see this monster locked inside of me

I'm dead inside, but have to say I'm fine. Men are forced to hide along side all the demons in their minds. I'm dead inside, contemplating suicide. I'm not afraid to die, I've been dead for such a long time, dead for such a long time