Day-Z Hero vs Bandit Rap Battle

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Oh god damn
I'm up against a bandit
You guys are more annoying
Than rubber banding
Always kill with no regard
For the state of the game

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
You're only saying that
Because you fail at aiming
Call yourself a hero?
That's a stupid name
For a dude that dropped out
Of the shooting range
It'd be boring to conform
To a running sim
So come on motherfucker
Let this war begin!

[Hero: Boyinaband]
It's not about kills
So when you're next dead
Go back to COD
Like an ex-veg, pescetarian!

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Shooting zombies all day Is so dull
That I may sleep
It's like I'm playing DayZ
And you're playing Day ZZZZ

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Uh... What are you doing?

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Ha! I'm just trolling hard
Yeah, you get me?
To emphasize your playstyle
Gives me narcolepsy

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Anyone can be a bandit
It's easy to tackle
Pass the tin of tuna
Cus' that shit is fish in a barrel!
Now let me diss your apparel
It's just some freaking old camo
Badly damaged man
And stinking like the
Spit of a camel
You're a generic terrorist
So go and Jihad Kablamo
I'm a hero, my manno

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Nope! You're a hipster mate
And with that checkered shirt
I see why your haters hate
Looking like a fucking second rate Nathan Drake!
On Balota airstrip
They call me hardcore
Cuz' I'm the cause of half the deaths in Stary Sobor
And everyone knows
That I post the post mortem
Kill count higher than all the Four Horsemen
I take more life than foreign warlord!

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Well I've saved more lives than Norman Borlaug

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Whoever told you lives saved
Matters need a lesson
Supports don't pay as well..
Don't you play League of Legends?

[Hero: Boyinaband]
You just shoot on sight
Because you don't have any patience

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Well I can wait for days
Until I snipe you in the face

[Hero: Boyinaband]
You camping no skill noob!

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Well you haven't even shot me
The only thing you could hit
Is a paraplegic zombie!
And even if I took a shot
From your gun mag
I'd be fine cause you'd
Come and save me
With a blood bag

[Hero: Boyinaband]
All you dudes shoot is
Fresh spawn noobs
That's impressive as putting on
Velcro shoes!
What's the point?
Your life expectancy is so low
Just go jump off a lighthouse
I hear there's one by Komarovo
Think you'll get my gear?
You're incorrect yo
Cuz' I'm the god damn
Fastest quick draw in Elektro!

This battle is mine man!
I'm blatantly right!
My play style requires
That I'm great on the mic!
So you try to reply to that diss
While I go prone...
Or have you still not figured out
How to use a microphone?

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Whatever Hero
I don't need vocals
I'm not afraid to take shots
You're teetotal
You're out there begging
For someone to bandage ya
I'm chilling on a hill
With more loot
Then a Lannister!

[Hero: Boyinaband]
I make to most of the game
I play it intricately

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
You're just jealous
That you have less
Pipsi than me
Jogging and eating
Ooh exciting combination
To you sound like fun
To me sound like constipation!

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Giving blood bags

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Nah giving Tea bags
Shoot and loot dude

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Help and heal man
I'm bout that teamplay

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
I prefer Solo

[Hero: Boyinaband]
I'm thinking long term

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Whatever, YOLO!

[Hero: Boyinaband]
This games about tension
Survival and drama
You're so unsociable
So just go back to ARMA
Fucking work together
That's the right way to play
You're doing it wrong!
What, did you taze your brain?
You amoral bastard
Learn to play the game!

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Ah you arrogant ass
There's no correct way to play
What gives you the right to say there is?

[Hero: Boyinaband]
A Hero's hard work
A bandit is a piece of piss
Mine's the difficult sort
That you couldn't manage
You need that quicker reward
Me, I like a challenge
A deeper sense of gratification
You're not creative

[Bandit: Jackfrags]
Ha! You really think that?
Let's see how I'd play this...
I'll come up and ask for a bandage
Then while you're in your inventory
Attack ... with a bat ... like I planned it!
I'll shoot you in the leg
Then use an Epinephrine
To bring you back from the dead
And then shoot you again!
Break your legs
Here's the Morphine
Do you want it?
Then I force-feed you
Rotten kiwi till' you vomit!
Handcuff and leave you
At the gas station
Then shoot the pump
And walk away
While the flames blazing
Now which motherfucking
One of us is creative?
You gonna combat log now?
Or face your fate here?

[Hero: Boyinaband]
Well this battle's gone on
Long enough
And it's been fun
But let's finish this in-game
In three... Two... One...