Dad

[Chorus]
My dicks gone hard I don't why
That I find men so hot
I wish I didn't and I wish that I
Was just fuckin' straight
But the only thing that's straight is my dick
Whenever I see a hot guy
It reminds me that I am gay, I'm so gay

[Verse 1]
Dear Thick, I phoned you but you still ain't callin'
It's your dad, actual fuck type of shit is you involved in?
Two weeks ago you was broke and now you ballin'
You sellin' dope or are robbin' it from a bank
'Cause, Shady, I saw what you were jottin' in your diary
You wantin' liposuction? That's some fuck shit
You tummy tuckin' like a fuckin' women? C'mon
You know you can just follow dads old trusty exercise program
But the less I know, that may be the better
I saw the porn tucked under your bed, I
Don't know what to say, you into some weird shit
Why the fuck you beatin' your dick to an ear, kid?
Shit, I'm fearin' it, the truth is appеarin' in the booth
I heard the shit you was rеcordin' the other day
I know you saw me pearin' in and you didn't know what to say
Froze with a fuckin' gaze, are you fuckin' gay?
You can be honest, man, c'mon, I promise I won't complain

[Chorus]
My dicks gone hard I don't why
That I find men so hot
I wish I didn't and I wish that I
Was just fuckin' straight
But the only thing that's straight is my dick
Whenever I see a hot guy
It reminds me that I am gay, I'm so gay

[Verse 2]
Dad, can you please stop sending letters please?
You literally live on the same floor as me, dosen't make any sense
But, anyway, sorry I didn't answer, I was touring, see
I made a parody of an Em song and now I'm sure to be
Big, you don't gotta worry, and I told you to stop talkin' about the gay thing
Maybe if you guys weren't so judgmental, I'd say something
But with your raging Christianity, I know if I come out
You'll be crazy—kickin', bannin' me out the house
It's not my choice, I didn't decide to be this way
You can try convince me, my dick? The chance that he'd obey
Is pretty slim—I mean thick, shit! That reminds me
About the liposuction, I decided to resort to a makeshift method
Don't say shit listen, OK, that's an incision, OK
There's it's over with, here's some gold and shit
That's my dick, please let go of it
Ok, anyway, I appreciate the concern dad
Depression and sadness, it can be hard to discern that
But I promise I'm okay, I can ensure that
But answer, I have called and I still haven't heard back

[Chorus]
My dicks gone hard I don't why
That I find men so hot
I wish I didn't and I wish that I
Was just fuckin' straight
But the only thing that's straight is my dick
Whenever I see a hot guy
It reminds me that I am gay, I'm so gay