Count Olaf vs Pennywise - Rap Battle (Halloween Special)

[Count Olaf]
So, you’re the being stalking the night
Shifting form through the greatest frights
I must say, that’s some pretty weak lore
I’ve heard It occur several times before
You claim to know exactly
What makes my blood curdle
At least I’m not scared
Of a giant space turtle
I’ll severely damage you
A phrase which here means
“Have its ass handed to”
Then by the time that the next generation
Finds a way to gеt to knowin’ ya
We’ve gone and lost thе larger portion
Of all the waning xenophobia
And as I Carrey this song
You’ll forfeit on account
Of the unfortunate events
Brought on by the Count
So, when the public fear that remains is down
You can find me fine dining at the Anxious Clown
[Pennywise]
I can’t tell if that verse was supposed to be a joke
Mycelia, I’ve got a good one
To make you choke
What did the playwright say?
To the clown in the first act?
Sorry Olaf
That’s a rap
Wa-HaH!
People ask why the adults underwhelm
And refuse to give these kids some help
It’s cuz in your world they’re stupid
But in Derry’s where they’re scared as hell
Who’s slippin’ while dissin’ omnipotent
Villainous Farcical Diligent village idiots
Stuck at being ambiguous like the Thing?
It’s the Count! It’s the Count!
He should kneel before a king!
You haven’t any Very Fire Diss in your arsenal
I bring a new meaning to Carnivorous Carnival
I can morph my flesh into Nosferatu
While you shop for
A dollar store costume
[Count Olaf]
Rooted in bitterness
Horseradish horseshit
Reeks of the eighties
No matter how in It is
I guess that’s why you’re so easy to mess with
I’ve seen Stranger Things trending on Netflix
It thrusts Its fists
But lands no hits
Your story’s kitsch
And I’m not scared of It
Look away! Look away!
Like a deer in the headlights
There’s a will, there’s a way
To turn out your headlights
[Pennywise]
You promise others their greatest desires
Then burn them with fire
You lie through your teeth
Think fear’s mediocre?
The words of the Joker
Wait until you get a load of me
You’re afraid of failure
Your schemes losing dominance
Most of all an adult
With a modicum of competence
So, quake at the gaze of
Your formidable ghoul
I may be a clown
But don’t take me for a fool
You’re no mastermind
You’re a minor annoyance
The leeches won’t mind
Who they find most buoyant!
Villain Flees Death
But the way it’s wrote in the prose
That’s Not How The Story Goes