Convoluted

Burning up, was it good to tear it down?
Convoluted thoughts inside of me
So far, so fast, so long and so what?
I guess I should grateful to be free

Well I'm not looking forward, and I'm not looking back
I'm stuck here in the middle and I'm off the beaten track
And I don't know where I'm going
But the road to better days seems far away

Shattered illusions cut deep when you believe
And even tough guys fall when it seems real
Sit here quite the psycho thinking of what was
This wasn't supposed to be part of the deal

Well I'm not looking forward -- I know I can't go back
I'm stuck here in the middle and I'm off the beaten track
And I've got a perfect life laid out in front of me
With memories of you

It's not betrayal -- it's just the truth
Wish I could learn to move on
If it hadn't been so great I might not feel so down
Guess you were right to move on
Tried to pass it off like I feel fine
A pain that doesn't seem to fade with time

Well I'm not looking forward, and I'm not looking back
I'm stuck here in the middle and I'm off the beaten track
And if I could buy oblivion, there's almost not a price I wouldn't pay