Conflicted

Intro:

When I was younger
I wanted to be a police officer
Til' my parents went and crushed that dream for me
Said it too dangerous and way too risky
And it especially wouldn't be accepting to somebody like me
It didn't cross my mind on what that meant
Then I grew up and opened up my eyes
Try not repent
Even now I cannot understand
Making no sense
Illogical
They gon' take my pride just for being there

Chorus:

On the offensive
While we left defenceless
Does it have a cause
Or is this what our God intended
Seeming like it's scripted
Mindsets that are twisted
Pulled in all directions
In the end I'm left conflicted

Verse 1:

Post traumatic stress got me fucked up
Anxious to open my mouth
Cos mixed reactions got me not knowing what's what
I've had enough of that
Opinions opinions
We lay the facts on the table
Just hurts their feelings
They get offended and snap
Cus they know it applies to them
But still they do not understand
So converted it into rap so people listen
For all I know I could be wrong
And equal rights are out of line because the white man said so
My morals lead me one way
Peers tug me another
Got me pulling at my hair in the dead of night during my slumber
Are we born to hate?
And born to be jealous of others who have some things that we want
But they know they can't get?
To the point it's viewed as cool and becomes a trend
Cus now everybody round the world is wishing they were oppressed
I digress
The art of following the crowd got me wondering what goes on in their heads
Some need a chill pill
Overdose on the meds

Chorus:

On the offensive
While we left defenceless
Does it have a cause
Or is this what our God intended
Seeming like it's scripted
Mindsets that are twisted
Pulled in all directions
In the end I'm left conflicted

Verse 2:

So much shit going on
Finally fuelled my fire to the max
Going off like a cherry bomb on my socials
Speaking my mind on the situations
And how it's not right to ignore if it doesn't affect you
But then it falls through (falls through)
Cus it's hard to be taken serious when everybody's sat there laughing at you
Trying to take me down
Shut my mouth
Yeah it's the kind of thing I don't like
It gets to me cus who the real clown?
Vandals on my property
Collateral damage
Throwing shit at my windows
Hate crimes, but they think they're magic
Stabbing the wheels of my car
Believe they doing the Lord's work?
And that makes me a pussy for just voicing my words?
All these people that I know can't cope with the message
Or maybe it's just me being weird
Should I stop and accept it
They and they pedestal around me
Want the line to just blend in
I know y'all listening
Cus I'm the one you all are obsessed with (hahahaha)
China lock Muslims in dated camps
But nobody ever once talked about that
They pick cotton for socks you're wearing
And tortured, beaten for beliefs they bearing
Blind eye is thrown to the innocence fading
Lies are thrown around, they believe what they saying
Embarrassing, human race never amazes me uh
They wanna hear me rap bout fucking bitches, irrelevant thinking
To quiet mouths that speak up for everything
Fill with doubt, we stop disagreeing
All day everyday the world always conflicting
Competing for things that never had meaning
Power, wealth and status
In the end does it really matter?
Degrading, endangering people of lower classes
Not cus they have to

[Intermission]

Chorus:

On the offensive
While we left defenceless
Does it have a cause
Or is this what our God intended
Seeming like it's scripted
Mindsets that are twisted
Pulled in all directions
In the end I'm left conflicted

Bridge:

This is not what I wanted to see
World falling apart at the hands of police
Innocents are targets in their killing sprees
While they let the guilty run free

Outro:

On which side of history do you wanna be?
The way we act now could save the lives of thousands maybe
Or is that just not how our lives were gifted
It's a constant debate, so until then my thoughts will stay conflicted