Confessions & Lessons

Whole life I've been living on 2 sides
In my gramas eyes I'm perfect I'm just divine
In the streets though my homies and I would do crimes
Thank God I never got caught never did time

Fortunate my lifestyle was torturing
From the porch I hear gunshots they scorching here
Dodge a few bullets went searching for more of it
While these mothers be mourning I glad it wasn't my momma I'd never want to put her through all of that trauma
Best did I ever did was get off the corner
That shit was exciting in the lemon we riding
Seek out niggas that's hiding cuz they jumped the homie so we got him
Kinda glad that we ain't never find em was war ready had techs and a 9 and enough ammo to change up the climate ain't care bout the violence
Yea my nigga we was wildin

The cycle my people keep going through
The bodies they chalk every week or two
The families that's crying on evening news
The blood on the concrete a rose just grew
And it's sad it's a habit we have
We get mad at a badge when they kill someone black
But we dont wink an eye if the shooter is black
We just talking and asking bout whens the pay back
Panicking walking so cautious cuz you rep the same flag
Might as well ride around with yo own body bag
X nobody safe in the streets bruh the shit is sad facts
X nothing but fury on the roads everybody mad max

Came a shot away from being in gangs
A phone call away from selling cocaine
A wall between catching one in the brain
A block away from dying on a thursday

X a knock away from being shackled ...and chained
X a stroke away from having a kid at 16
X a failure away from just losing my brain
X a prayer away from just ending the pain

X I remember what my family say
X they said lil boy you better pray
X you'll eventually see better days
X faith will get you back on track if
You ever stray
X so I found a way to meditate
X think about every move I made
X took flight or more like levitate
X took charge now I'm here to stay
X pac told us stay strong there'll be better dayz

My mother named me marc
My uncle raised me hard
43rd street left me scarred
Never thought I'd make it far

Football ain't work out
College ain't work out
Banging ain't work out
Loving ain't work out

What I'm I to do now
I was sitting in the house
Watch porn then work out
I was torn in and out
Felt like I was in a cloud
So I said it out loud

And I liked the way it sound
So I wrote my pain down
Started crying out my mouth

I found somebody to talk to
Somebody to confide
Somebody to ride with
Somebody I never lied to

Someone I could rely on
To tell me when I was wrong
To help me to stay strong
Somebody to lean on

Somebody to plead to
Express all my dreams to
To share all the bad news
Somebody that never tells me to shut up
Explained to me how my life has been set up
When I'm at my lowest they told me to get up
To hit the ground running and dont ever let up

Now I really gotta make it
The top spot ima take it
Keep it real never fake it
Introducing yall to greatness

X these grey hairs been growin
X that's just my wisdom showin
X I thrive when I'm alone and
X I'm fine that I'm my own
X I'm really at my best when I'm sitting at home
X thoughts looking for a way to escape from my dome

X used to smoke jet fuel now I'm pumping the shit
X used to view most girls for they ass and they tits
X used to hit raw dog then call em a bitch
X used to have a dirty gun I was clutching a sig
X realized gun size still dont make you big
X street cred nice buy it can't provide for yo kids
X reputation means nothing they dont care what you did
X every nigga aiming at you they gone test you ya dig

X life of a thug nigga I done travelled that road
X i was tryna emulate every trapper i know
X i was losing my emotions man my heart was so cold
X i was sipping on that potion cuz it made me feel bold

X had an intuition found a purpose in my life
X came to fruition that i ain't want pay the price
X swear in my visions I saw grama bb twice
X now I'm on a mission to make my wrongs all right