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Cocktails for Two by Spike Jones and His City Slickers

About

Originally published in 1934 to celebrate the end of Prohibition, Cocktails for Two was written by Arthur Johnston and Sam Coslow. This cover by Spike Jones is what is known as a “Travesty”. The lyrics are unchanged but the music is messed with to sound rowdy and contradict the sung lyrics.
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Cocktails for Two Lyrics

Oh what delight to be given the right
To be carefree and gay once again
No longer slinking, respectfully drinking
Like civilized ladies and men

No longer need we miss
A charming scene like this...

In some secluded rendezvous (whoopee, whistle, bang)
That overlooks the avenue (horn noises)
With someone sharing a delightful chat (yickety yickety)
Of this and that with cocktails for two (clink clink)

As we enjoy a cigarette (wheezing cough)
To some exquisite chansonette (fiddle sound)
Two hands are sure to slyly meet beneath
The serviette with cocktails for two (clink clink)

My head may go reeling (slide whistle)
But my heart will be obedient (heartbeat sound)
With intoxicating kisses
For the principal ingredient (pop fizz laugh)

Most any afternoon at five (ting ting ting ting)
We'll be so glad we're both alive (ahhhhh)
Then maybe fortune will complete the plan
That all began with cocktails for two (clink crash)

(musical interlude with hiccups & other strange noises)

Most any afternoon at five (Sunday to Monday at five)
We'll be so glad we're both alive (we'll be so glad we're alive)
Then maybe fortune will complete her plan (oooh-we-ooh)
That all began with cocktails for two (hic) two (hic) two-we-ooh (hic)

Cocktails for Two Q&A

Who wrote Cocktails for Two's ?

Cocktails for Two was written by Sam Coslow & Arthur Johnston.

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