Cleptobrainiac

[Intro]
Jakki: This is so incriminating. 'Bout to teach you some shit though
Student: That's cool. I just wanna learn man
Jakki: Pen and pad please
Student: Pen and pad? Psst. Pen and pad
Jakki: Lesson one
Student: What the fuck?

[Verse One: Jakki (Student)]
You trying to fuck with us squirt? (Yeah!)
The first thing you gonna need is a coat and a button up shirt (Okay, a button up shirt...)
The stores we going to got cameras, security
And homie, if you get caught, you don't know me (Got it.)
Understand I only do for self (Cool)
Which means I will not share anything I take off the shelf (Understand that)
And the risk outweighs the reward if the mission's soft (Understand)
So be careful in every store that you ripping off (Cool)
I want you to steal like this was your last day
Throw on your coat, first button your shirt up half way (Understand)
And tuck it in your jeans, B (..tuck em in..)
Now when you throw shit in your shirt
You'll still be able to move your arms freely (Okay)
Which brings less suspicion to you
The coat over your shirt makes it so no one can see the goods shifting through (Yeah, that makes sense.)
Don't worry too much about security, half the time
They got half a mind
Undercover but they asinine (Okay)
I'll put you onto how they look like me (Yeah)
And they're easy to spot because they look like thieves (You mean...)
Meaning they're always carrying the facial expressions we have (Alright, alright)
Too alert, worrisome, overactive, see lad (heheh, yeah)
What I'm getting at is you can spot em easier with long lessons
From following you too long to being in the wrong sections
And believe it or not, no joke
You know they undercover when it's this cold and they have no coat (hehe, you do have a point, cuz!)
Watch out for alarms cause them shits can serve and break (Alright)
Some of them match the same color as the merchandise
Make sure you have two other niggas so no one can can ya (That makes sense)
One on each side, you in the middle, with back to the camera
Your clothes fully buttoned with the exception of the middle
Leave that unbuttoned so you can deposit shit your riddled (I got ya)
Don't ever let the camera see what you lift up (Yeah)
You should be ready now, let's see what you picked up (Alright, yo I'm ready)

[Verse Two]
You pretty decent (Thanks)
Maybe you ready for recent schemes (I'm ready, dawg)
I've been pulling off with my team
Like this one here
Believe me not too much is required (Okay)
You need to be convincing and a professional liar (..professional liar...)
You need balls and you need to be chill
Under pressure and I'll teach you how to legally steal (huh, legally steal?)
Don't worry about the cameras
Don't worry about the people (Alright)
Only be concerned if the cashier sees you (Okay, why's that?)
You see the cashier's important in this stunt (Alright...)
Cause they're the dummies who gon' give you anything you want (Anything I want?)
Before you even start, know you need to scout the slob
You know, the type that look like they don't care about they job (That's a definite)
Now look for something expensive like that computer tower
That is what you're gonna take up to the counter (Take it to the counter?)
Now look the cashier in the eye, don't get nervous
With a smile say "I would like to return this" (HEHE, Damn!)
They might want a reason
If they ask it
Tell 'em you bought if for your mom and she already has it (Okay)
They'll ask you for a receipt, you won't regret it
Tell 'em you don't have it, they'll give you in store credit (Shit!)
This works for most stores except for those fronting (Damn!)
Congratulations, you just legally stole something (Aw, hell naw!)
Go try that shit, I know you eager to earn
I'ma act like I ain't with you, let's see what you learn

[Verse Three]
I like your steez cat, you catch on fast (Thanks, man!)
You got $500 in credit, now that's not bad (Yeah)
I suggest you use that shit at a different location (Why's that)
Not really necessary, I just do it to be safe man (Alright)
The next scam we're gonna do takes more balls
No room for flaws, you gotta be raw (Oh, I'm raw man! I'm ready!)
You need about three other cats that's down
And a driver like me that'll get you 'round town (Cool)
See that video store? That's the target (Yeah)
Here's a stolen car, over there is where I'll park it
This is Justice, Les, and Copywrite (Wassup wit cha?)
These are my niggas
They gonna help you with this heist (Sup, cuz?)
The same cats you didn't know earlier, you know now
Do not bitch out on 'em when it's time for the showdown (That ain't gonna happen, cuz!)
This scheme is almost the same as the first
Which means you need a coat and a button up shirt (Got it! *zip, zip*)
See them video games in the protective case
That you can't open without a key (Yep!), take 'em anyway (Take 'em?!?)
Take as many as you can little dumb scout (That's cool)
Fuck the alarms, all y'all niggas is gonna run out (Heh, we gon run out?)
You know where the cars parked across the street and we out (Alright)
Any cops will think you still on feet (Ahhh, that makes sense!)
And while they think you still running around
We breaking them cases open on the other side of town (hehe, hell naw!)
That's it for now cat, today you were great (Thanks man! I'm gon do that shit!)
Tomorrow I'll teach you shit I can't say on tape
But for now here's a lesson you should never forget (Yo, what's that?!?!?)
That's a .38 nigga, give me your shit

Student: What the fuck? Nigga, I thought we was cool? Fuck you

{laughing}