[Joel]
Hey, sirs. Uh, wha--what's up?
[Dr. Erhardt]
Our income if this new gig works out.
[Dr. Forrester]
Yes. Larry and I have developed a new chain of fast food restaurants with very low overhead because we don't cook our food.
[Dr. Erhardt]
'Cause frying and broiling takes out a lot of the nutrients.
[Dr. Forrester]
Yes. Uh, if your body likes another body, why don't you try one of our burgers au naturel? It's, uh, ripped from the bone to your plate in seconds. It's "Clay and Lar's Flesh Barn". Ha, ha. Uh, make with the lyrics, Larry.
[Dr. Erhardt]
If you're tired of the same old fare,
You've got a friend named Clay and Lar.
All our meat is guaranteed rare
Because we don't cook it!
[Dr. Forrester]
You see, cooking takes out all the flavor.
[Dr. Erhardt]
If you're tired of cookin' at home,
Try our meat right off the bone.
If you listen, you can hear it moan
Because we don't cook it!
[Dr. Forrester]
Stunned, killed right at your table, eviscerated, very fresh.
[Dr. Erhardt]
Now, there's no need for you to drive through,
Our fresh meat will walk out to you.
You'll say hi, you'll say moo,
It's Clay and Lar's Flesh Barn.
[Dr. Forrester]
Fifteen locations to serve you, now in Altoona.
(Reprise)
[Dr. Erhardt]
I think I'll file this thing for you
As I always seem to do
I like working for you Clay
'Cause you're a really neat guy.
[Dr. Forrester]
I think you should file ''this'', Larry.
Mystery Science Theater 3000 released Clay & Lar’s Flesh Barn on Tue Feb 20 1990.