Cash Cow (A Rock Opera In Three Small Acts)

[Intro]
Move
Move in closer
Move in closer to the
Move in closer to the middle of the frame

[Verse 1]
It was a morning just like any other morning
In the Sinai desert, 1200 B.C
It glistened, it glowed, it rose from the gold of the children of Israel
And most of the adults
The cash cow!
The golden cash cow had a body like the great cows of ancient Egypt
And a face like the face of Robert Tilton
Without the horns
And through the centuries, it has roamed the earth
Like a ravenous bovine seeking whom it may lick
Cash cow! Cash cow!
From the valley of the shadow of the outlet mall
To customized petwear boutique
From the trailer of the fry chef to the palace of the sheikh
The cash cow lurks
The cash cow lurks
The cash cow lurks, hahahahahaha!

[Chorus]
Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-ooooooo
Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo

[Verse 2]
I was young and needed the money
I had money and needed more money
I was filthy rich and all I wanted was love
And a little more money
Woe to you, proud mortal
Secure in your modest digs
You think you're immune?
You, who couldn't finger said cow in a police line-up with the three little pigs?
Cash cow! Master of disguises!
Who's gonna change shape at will?
Who's the eye on the pyramid on the back of the dollar bill?
Who loves power lunchin' from Spago to the Sizzler?
Guess who's coming to dinner! Hahahahahaha!

[Chorus]
Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-ooooooo
Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo
Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-ooooooo
One yank on that udder
Will land your butter
In a sling
First one's free
Cow junkies, take heed

[Verse 3]
Cash cow, comin' to get ya!
Why?
'Cause you think this is stupid, don't you?
The cash cow will not be mocked!
The cash cow's planning a coup!
The cash cow chews cud bigger than you!
Woe, woe, woe to you
Who blow off this warning
Perhaps you've already been licked
I, too, was hypnotized by those big cow eyes
The last time I uttered those three little words
"I deserve better!"

[Guitar Solo]