Brand New Dance

There's a new dance craze sweepin' the land
First you get out of bed, then you attempt to stand
You get out of bed, you get to your feet
You got to just stand there, you can't retreat
Now here comes the hard part, it's bad news
You got to bend over and put on your shoes

Over in the bed lies your sleepin' wife
Snorin' like a sailor, she's the love of your life
But that women is a martyr and you know it's true
Who the hell else would put up with you?
You got a brand new dance and it goes like this
You wake up in the mornin' and look in to the abyss

Take a look
Take another look, come on!

It's a fight to the finish
It's a flackin' and a fray
Got a brand new song and I sing it everyday
I got a new smell and it's called "The Old Man"
A new taste sensation, I'd say it was bland
But that senior discount, that's my kind of treat
But when I get on the bus, you got to give me a seat

Come on, baby

Yeah, the water is rising way past flood stage
The woods are on fire, and that's a turn the page
So we stack the?
You drink a little coffee then you go take a seat
Read your business section, up there on your throne
You got a brand new dance, and you do it alone

Don't just sit there
Do something
Shake a tail feather!

You got a brand new dance, you gotta get you some work
It's a little like the Monkey, and a lot like the Jerk
The Chicken and the Pony and the Frug and the Swap
It's a brand new dance, and you wish it would stop
You'd rather be a workin' stiff, than a lazy slob
Sha na na, don't get you no job

Hey hallelujah it's election time
Vote in a booth for the big boss line
But it's the same old song, same old dance
Same long shot at the same slim chance, yeah
One of those fools is bound to win
But it's the same old, same old, all over again

Here we go

There's a new dance craze sweepin' the land
First you get out of bed, then you attempt to stand
Get out of bed, get to your feet
You got to just stand there, you can't retreat
Now here comes the hard part, it's a bad news
You got to bend over and put on your shoes