Boardin’ USA

There’s a groovy new craze and it’s really, really making a scene, now
It can make you go totally nuts, if you know what I mean, now
All you need is a rag and a cold, dark room, a pitcher of water and some restraints too
Just tie your dude down, baby, come and waterboard with me

Well, he’ll cry and he’ll shake and he’ll tell you that it feels like he’s drowning
(waterboard, waterboard)
Then you say you’ll take the corpse of his son and throw it back where you found it
And the next thing you know, he’ll be singing a tune
Then you can cut him loose and send him back to his dune
Yeah, you can hear the waterboarders screamin’ all over the bay

Well, I know it’s torture when the sun goes down
But I wanna know what they’re all thinkin’ about
Let’s take that 8 year old girl, and let’s strap her down
Baby come and waterboard with me

When the sun comes up, I’m haunted by the screams and the shakin’
(We're takin' little Suzie for a face-jacuzzi)
But that all fades when I smell you cooking eggs with some bacon
(It's smooth going down, but comin' up it's a doozy)
A little bit of breakfast and some coffee too
And a guy who’s got some explainin’ to do
He’s already starving and he’s black and he’s blue
And still he’s waterboarding all day

Waterboard. Let’s do the waterboard
Whoa