Ballad of the Lukewarm

You'll find my name in the telephone listings
My credit is better than fair
My daughter is running for sophomore princess
I'm making my son cut his hair

I never miss voting or church every Sunday
I do what I can to support
The church and the state will be satisfied one day
And then I can give to the poor

My mother is happy, we found her a home
With folks of her status and age
She gave us the family Bible last year
We'll keep it in the attic 'til the pages turn yellow
'Cause antiques are quite the rage

My mortgage is paid and my Chevrolet
I seldom ever beat my wife
I can't understand why my name isn't there
Listed in Your Book of Life