Bad Wolf

(chorus)
. . . Big bad wolf!
. . Baaad wolf (4x)

Where have you been, young man? You get over here!
I've been worried sick while you've been off God-knows-where
In some distant time enjoying alien views
Oh you've been fighting a time war? A likely excuse!
I've been stuck here, you know, where time goes straight
And while I've had to wait, let me tell you things weren't great
There was nothing on TV but that may be no surprise
So I had to watch dreck like Star Trek Enterprise
The void you left behind was annoying and substantial
There wasn't a show FOX couldn't wait to cancel
And no more music videos on MTV
I tell you man, the Golf Channel ain't tempting me
I blame you, if you didn't leave me
I never would have had to battle with reality TV
Instead we all had to hear William Hung sing
And somehow thanks to you now Snookie is a thing

(chorus)

I see that you still can't quite control it right
Returning Rose a full year after a twelve hour flight
If you can't return a guest to her time at her behest
For her sake maybe you should go retake your driving test
You always did want to grab the TARDIS by the reigns
And control it like a child with a pair of great danes
And it caused you great pains, threw you all over creation
That won't exactly make for an ideal vacation
So what's the story? You're the last of your kind?
The daleks are gone, the Time Lords are confined
In a time-locked war out of the main time-stream?
One question, what does that even mean?
I deserve a better explanation than that
I defended the show from never-ending attacks
After nine hundred years it should be me you are thanking
Remember you are not too old for a spanking

(chorus)

You didn't call, you didn't write during all that time
I didn't know if you were dead or had become a street mime
Not knowing what was going on really was the hardest
But I see you had time to remodel the TARDIS
All we got was a crappy movie from FOX
A half-hearted attempt for our two-hearted Docs
It was nothing like the stories that have been so glorious
From here to Raxacoricofallapatorius
During that time we couldn't find any mentions
There was almost nothing Doctor Who related at conventions
But fans would still gather rather than let it die
And pour a forty on the curb for episodes gone by
But now the Who Fans Anonymous meeting can ajourn
He says "Run!"- The prodigal son has returned
And the fans can hardly wait to see the Daleks to attack
I can't tell you how great it feels to have you back

(chorus x2)