Bad Shodam (English Translations)

Unfortunately I’ve learnt not to laugh
Even when I find a purpose to after a joke
Once I laughed loudly
I bit my hand to feel the pain and stop laughing
I’ve learnt that my kindness has no reflection
There is no such thing as a conscience in this story
????
To lie to the needy when I can’t afford to help them
I leant that a person’s sins can become normal to them
And spiritual objects could become materials in one second
I learnt to destroy people’s emotions
And not care for anyone’s successes
I learnt to turn on people
Listen to their heartbreaks
But mock those heartbreaks in an argument
In this world
All these negative people and dead ends are full of danger
You are stood on a crossroad surrounded by snakes
Stuck
Shall I just stay silent
And let people walk all over me
Or become a coward who’s let his
Disgraceful environment take over him
Don’t tell me not to react to the problem
Because for every action there is a reaction
I was a river, I’ve become a dam
I was the day, I’ve become the night
I was good but I moved on
And I Became Bad
Generation after generation
Blood through blood
This will always stay in our lives
Know this
We hurt each other like dominos
You to me, me to him, and him to her
Have I ever seen kindness
I bitterly answer no
To he who watched me dying
Didn’t care and wished bad things for me
Oh God, you are watching over me
I feel like I’m falling into a deep pit
Accept that I need to protect myself in this
I was never bad but do you remember
That day I was stood in the cheap grocery queue
I saw a rich obese guy in his Mercedes
Sat in an ugly suit
Money dripping from him, from head to toe
In that moment I knew it was my day to die
I saw the person sat next to him was my girlfriend
She saw me but I was a stranger to her
Dressed in the same coat I brought her
You give so much love, and this is what you get
She left you for a spoilt brat
Whos still dependent onto his dad
Lunch every day, and still an apology from his mum
I mean, a Mercedes at his door with a bow on top
He talks fancy to impress them
He says he wants to continue his dads business
He talks too much about himself
But I know he rented that Benz off his dad for free
But I'm here borrowing money from others
Just to spend it on you
I rolled a carpet down when you walked on the street
For you to be mine I made a deal with God
I thought of you as an angel
Now you are not with me and I’m alone
I'm leaving you in an alley of loneliness
In this world full of fakes
You sleep with him
And me with sleeping pills
If I asked you who that guy is
You would laugh and say
“aah he’s like my brother”
These “brothers” of yours
They took off your clothes and wore you
I told you his lust will ruin you
You won’t be his bride, he’s married to himself
(sigh) everything you said to this day was a lie
Even half you’re face is two faced
You said “he will come back and
I will make him putty in my hands”
You said “sorry, its sorted, please”
You came back to me after 6 years
Is it because of me or my name
Leave that name alone, that's my career
Put that aside, in reality I'm Yaser
I’ve worked hard for this name
I deserve my title
I'm annoying you with my stories
Giving you a headache with my heartache
Sorry... you be happy because I was never.. bro
In this story you were my rock
Actually, this is funny
How we are entitled to our own opinions
I keep talking about how I’m a good guy
But I too was a not nice person to many people either
Money. Girls. Fame
It was with good intentions though
But let them talk nonsense about me
Empty themselves and make me pure
I learnt this from society
I have no excuse my behavior was wrong
If I'm hurting I deserved it
Anyway, the past is the past
Let’s leave it
That’s enough of this essay
If you would have lived the life I had
You wouldn’t shut up about it either
But for me rap means a story
Of a guy who fell down but stood back up
Yes, rap is motivation
From the bottom of the earth to the sky