April Fools

[Chorus 1: Schäffer the Darklord]
Two more days to April Fools, April Fools, April Fools
Two more days to April Fools, Silver Shamrock

[Verse 1: Schäffer the Darklord, Coolzey]
Happy Holidays, it won't be like last time
I get you're sick of tricks and that old annual pastime
But this time, things'll finally go your way
I'm talking happiness, success, and health, and maybe today;
You're gonna land a new job, gonna find a companion
Folks on social media will post with compassion
Climate change effects will be reversed eventually to just a memory
Don't believe me, go on, tell'em Zey:
Yes! That's a guarantee, no more mistakes, that's in the past
In this New Year, your resolution's gonna last
And every vote that you cast, it counts and it matters
You can change the world and break the cyclical patterns
Reach out to estranged friends, I'm sure they'd like to make amends
Expect replies from all the emails you send
You're gonna watch what you spend and stay well within your budget
And speaking of friends, Hey, you know you can depend on me
(And also me!)
We'll always be there if you need, and all the inspirational quotes you post on your feed are totally helpful
You're such a font of wisdom, so let's rise up
Because we're gonna beat the system!
There's gotta be some people in power who'll listen
To what we have to say, so let's take a full day off work;
To call our local representative, cause they work for us, it ain't all about the Benjamins
Oh and did we mention that, depression will be ended when chemists invent and perfect a new preventative medicine?
But then again you won't need that prescription
Since your years of therapy will finally fix your condition
Defeat has come to you before
But you're the one we're rootin for
Your hopes of falling to the floor, we'll lift'em up;
We do it for, that look in your eyes
And that feeling we've missed
As we both say "surprise!"
We're revealing the twist!

[Refrain 1: Schäffer the Darklord, Coolzey]
We're just kiddin', just teasin', just ribbin', didn't mean it, quit trippin', it's the season, For breaking rules!
Just joshin', just playin', just gotcha, just sayin', just stop us, from celebrating; April Fools!
Just messin', it's a laugh, it's a lesson, in a class, it's a test, you won't pass, when you're
Taken to school!
Just joking, just goofin, trust broken, just screwing, trust no one, telling you the truth on
April Fools!

[Skit: Schäffer the Darklord, Coolzey]
Nailed it *glass clink*
Oh we most certainly did
Excellent jest sir
We do have such fun here don't we?
Eat your heart out [?]
A delightful twist indeed-d Zey-d
Oh but the song’s not quite over yet now is it
Well I suppose it isn't
I wonder… what could possibly develop

[Chorus 2: Schäffer the Darklord]
One more day to April Fools, April Fools, April Fools

[Verse 2: Schäffer the Darklord, Coolzey]
Okay for real tho, this time will be different
There is nothing bad coming for you, honest there isn’t
And when you get home tonight
Strangers won't be waiting inside in the dark
Hiding in your closet or your basement
And that lump growing on your hump; it’s probably benign
And those test results you’re waiting for; it’s probably fine
The voices that you hear is probably someone walking by; outside
And the clatter in the attic; just mice
An unprecedented terror won’t envelope your spirit
You won't even need to scream but if you did someone would hear it
If any evil gets through you'll probably escape
Won't be abandoned, you'll be rescued, I bet you'll be safe
And you know you’re okay because you've got your faith in the lord
And of course the gates of Heaven await
When you finally pass on, because there is an afterlife after all
And all your loved ones are waiting with open arms

[Refrain 2: Schäffer the Darklord, Coolzey]
We're just kiddin', just teasin', just ribbin', didn't mean it, quit trippin', it's the season, For breaking rules!
Just joshin', just playin', just gotcha, just sayin', just stop us, from celebrating; April Fools!
Just messin', it's a laugh, it's a lesson, in a class, it's a test, you won't pass, when you're
Taken to school!
Just joking, just goofin, trust broken, just screwing, bust open, gonna ruin you on
April Fools!

[Chorus 3: Schäffer the Darklord]
Happy, Happy April Fools, April Fools, April Fools
Happy, Happy April Fools, Silver- STOP
STOP IT. STOP IT
Turn it off
STOP IT. STOP IT
STOP IIIIITTT…