Apartment

If heaven doesn't look like your apartment I don't want to go
If the floor isn't covered in records and cat hair
I'd just as soon stay home

If the sheets don't smell of cigarette smoke
If the dishes aren't piled up high
Then I just don't care much about where I'm going when I die

If I die tonight, I hope the hearse lets me off at your place
If I die tonight, I hope the hearse lets me off at your place

If you can't get to heaven in the passenger seat of your Dodge conversion van
Then I guess I'm just going to have to keep on living as long as I possibly can
If the pearly gates don't flash with the neon of a roadside motel
Then I'll take my hand and keep on driving till we get back to this hell

If I die tonight, I hope the hearse lets me off at your place
Baby it's so right
You can stay with me tonight
I can be over in an hour
Can you bring a little whiskey?
I hope nothing happens between now and then

If I die tonight
If heaven doesn't look like your mother's guestroom, I don't want to go
If there's no one around to play me Big Star records and run my bath real slow
If you ain't there to sing me to sleep when I close my eyes so tight
Then I just don't think it's such a good idea for us to go to sleep tonight

If I die tonight
I hope the hearse lets me off at your place
If I die tonight
I hope the hearse lets me off at your place