American

[Intro]
How y'all doin there folks?
My name is Aberdeen Washington
And I'm a proud American
And a terrorist fighter
That's right
Hey gimme another beer bitch!

[Hook]
Now when the day Bin Laden comes to town
I'mma drop a duece
Wipe it up with his towel
Mow my lawn, sit on the couch
Imma watch some football
I pray to the Lord the Cowboys win
And beat the hell outta them damn Redskins
Call up the boys
Get drunk as shit
God damn right I'm an American

[Verse 1]
That's right
I'm American
Got a picture of Reagan above my fire
Next to the deer I shot with my rifle
NRA hell yeah I support 'em
No pro choice
No abortion
Mexicans, send 'em back over the border
Ride on home to Samoa
Or wherever they come from
They're takin' our jobs
Eatin' our hamburgers
Takin' our jobs
They takin' our jobs!
I see them in the field
I'm takin' their head off
I hate my job
And I hate my boss
But I love my country

[Bridge]
And I pray to God
That the Cowboys win
Fuck yeah Romo!
And the Cowboys win
That's right, that's right, that's right
C'mon, everybody
Just clap your hands
If you love our country
If you love our land
That's right
And if you're not clapping your hands
You're a terrorist
And you eat sand (sandwiches)

[Hook]
The day Bin Laden comes to town
I'mma drop a deuce
Wipe my poop with his towel
Mow my lawn
Sit on the couch
And I'mma watch some football
And I pray to the lord the Cowboys win
And beat the hell outta them damn Redskins
Call up the boys
Get drunk as shit
God damn right I'm American

[Verse 2]
I'm Ameri-fuckin-can
And John McCain and Sarah Palin
I know you lost out there
It was a tough one
But you're still two mavericks in my book
Don't worry about it
And listen Palin
I heard you like beer, me too
I don't have a 6 pack
But I got a beer bong in my pants
What do ya' say we go get shit faced
In a helicopter and kill a moose
America, the chosen, guns, explosions, McDonald's, bowling
You don't like it? We exploit you!
Pop a pill, get a boner!
Hell yeah
Tony Romo
Man that guy is so damn cute
I wanna sack his boner
And ride him broke back
All the way to Wyoming
No homo, sike!
Hey I said no homo
Fuck terrorists!
I mean like, I don't wanna fuck a terrorist
Guys I'm kidding!
I like Romo
I don't "like" Romo
I said, "Fuck terrorists"
Not, "I wanna fuck a terrorist"
You wouldn't? if you caught Bin Laden
You wouldn't give him one in the butt?
For America?
If you said "no homo" right after you did it?
It doesn't count if it's terrorists

[Bridge]
Hey little Aberdeen
Come in here
Yeah?
Hey come sing the national family anthem
Come on
USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!
Hey hey!
USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!
Hey hey!

[Outro]
That's right
I'm an American citizen
Aberdeen Washington
This is my country
And just because Barack Obama
Won the presidential election
Does not mean that half the country
Doesn't feel the same way I do
Man I came to America (yeah)
And I live in America (c'mon)
And I live in America
I do too dad
Lemme get em
And I live in America
Dad and I live in America
Shut up!
Little Aberdeen shut the fuck up!
My bad
Lemme tell 'em
That's right
I'm American