Afraid for Ava

We run faster with light pockets
And I'm the Ben Johnson of my block
Pavlov
Running when guns shoot - I sprint fierce
And when I say I'm the king, I'm sincere
But I still run in the shadows of giants
Goliaths
And I'm David waiting
Aiming
Where you see fame from true skills
I only see lames on two stilts
Dropping the same three-pointers you're scoring
Only I’m in the schoolyard when I score them
And if a tree falls down in the forest
Fuck that…You get what my point is
You can only wear the crown when appointed
And I ain't paying for votes,,,Fuck the GOAT
What's great when a legend is ignored
Adored by a handful of members on the board
Lefsetz says…
If you're not blowing up, you’re not good enough
And I respond…
Bob, I could give a fuck about what you think
I know I'm top-tier
But the industry pretends that I'm not here
While the exclusive stars in Canada
Couldn't sell a record in Buffalo
Jealous
Jaded
Famous for not being famous
Afraid for Ava
.
I'm just thinking out loud
Drowning in these thoughts
Running out of breath
I forgot how to swim
I may never see the sun again
.
My little girl sleeps on my chest and I wonder what she dreams about
Eats, sleeps and shits
She barely leaves the house
Maybe she sees the images from the storybooks her mother reads aloud
When she dreams…
Maybe she sees daddy dancing in pajama pants
Trying to make her laugh
Or mommy singing lullabies softly until she falls asleep
Or is it all a dream?
Will Ava see her daddy as a failure?
Or respect him for chasing the dreams that made him a nightmare?
Craven
He never gave up or caved
In the basement remained
And the basement’s a state of mind
Desolation
Darkness…Friendless
The cable guy
Why say “hello” just to say “goodbye”?
You either leave me alone, or stay the night
Will you remember me?
Will I be there when you walk the lanes of your memories?
Is my legacy…
Famous for not being famous
Afraid for Ava