3x

I dreamt of my mother and woke up exhausted
I say the word "dreamt" to myself three times
It's been a whole year since I had and lost it
I say my old name to myself sometimes

I pick an old fight with my dad in my head
I say the word "dad" to myself three times
It's been a whole life since that word was sacred
I know that I am by myself sometimes

And it's true I don't have anyone to call
And it's true I don't have you
And it's true this happens every fall
But it hurts like it's still new

I pick up the phone, and you sound exhausted
You say "I'll be fine" to yourself three times
I thought I'd come over, but then you dropped it
I like to lay blame on you sometimes

And it's true I don't have anyone to call
And it's true I don't have you
And it's true this happens every fall
But it hurts like it's so new

I go to get food and come home exhausted
I'm feeding myself each day three times
I'm left with too little or too much too often
I wonder when I'll get it right sometimes
I'll get it right sometime