10th-Anniversary Rap-rospective

“This is a rap about things around my house
First let’s start with ---”

I started off making crazy videos in my basement
That hasn’t changed yet
‘Ain't it funny how you come to know so many different things
And how much introspection one decade can bring

‘Cause, see, there comes a time
On the typewriter when you’re punching lines
It’s a nailbiter, man, ‘cause some will fall and some will rise
Whether it’s a battle or you challenge me with puns and rhymes
They might call me 4yo but I’m one of a kind

Since the moment I spawned I was a technologue
Infant making the switches to digital from analog
And if you didn’t then you were programmed wrong
But don’t be woebegone
My baby photo’s an emoticon

Pokemon’s got the top score in my heart
They used to call me a nerd, but now, it’s core to my art
Took a dive into gaming, picked the data apart and now
I’m beginning to feel like a Smash God, Smash God

I can say I’m underestimated
Cover my face and rap you'll wonder and you'll ask who made it
I'm knocking rappers out it’s nothing under rest they’re taking
Under arrest for taking me as underestimated

Yo, we're crazy, zanier than Animaniacs
Taking over like when Pinky and the Brain attack
Skedaddle, grab your rattle and your blankie, and go take a nap
We the Energizer bunnies draining all you Rayovacs

My only baggage is I’m no fame magnet
Similar to Jack the Ripper I’m a no name savage
I’ll get tossed around like a Romaine Salad
But give me a dictionary and I’ll go explain the planet

Just pick a shrub and hear me make a million metaphors
Be my bud, you and I will grow forevermore
Who needs sleep when we’re always catching dreams?
It’s my destiny - give me liberty or I’ll forever freeze

The medium
The medium
We would all succumb to the medium
A new media
The mean, the mode, the range is all the new median

You’re less argument and more ad homonym
Saying this is lame! he should really add homonyms
But that’s only spelling, they don’t rhyme like homophones
And I keep it busy like the tones you hear on home phones

It’s a battle ground without a real warrior
Everyone forgets all the reasons for memorials
If we were all immortal we would never let it die
But we never live enough to make us curable

We’re an army full of corporeal zombies
Looking to idolatry
For scholarly proxies

If so many people with a brain
‘can’t think for themselves
Then we’re all morons, comma Roxas

I’m Another Side to Another Story arc
I’ll Deep Dive towards the light inside the Door to Dark
Can I piece together what they’re piecing apart?
Am I this puzzled or am I just Another with No Heart?

You gotta be a little heartless
When you’re spitting on darkness
There’s compartments in this hard head that don’t make sense just to start with

And If a kid my age thinks this is garbage
I’mma stick his name in my diss department
I’mma hit the target when I clinch the market
Of the hip hop heads in the kindergarten

“Never Melt Never doubt There’s a light in this tunnel that I just haven’t found. What I’ll do with it I haven’t thought about But if I let the frost bite, Don’t thaw me out.”

My dictionary was varying
In the sesquipedalian area
Until I threw a challenge in the air
And now it’s scary how my twitter in hysteria
Apparently my fans are Quintessential librarians

It’s a little bit fun to riddle a ton
Get a challenge from every one of my internet buds
But it can’t even compete with the rush
Of grandma flicking the griddle and
Drizzling syrup on cinnamon buns
While I’m sipping on something when the morning looms
And to start your day you need warm up fuel
By absorbing ooze out of florida fruits
But they aren’t blue, it’s orange juice

But it’s harder to rhyme with Benedict Cumberbatch
My best friend Kevin told me what’s up with that
He said, well everyone loves your raps
But I think you need a bigger challenge
And he couldn’t stump the Mat!

Can’t touch
Can’t move
I can only do what I was made to do

So come soar with me
We’ll ride aboard the breeze
Over stormy seas
And through the warmest heat

Whether I'm a toddler or father
I know I'm guided to respond to the beat of the same heart
But I wonder
What the future will author for
Someone walking the boulevard of a Cosmic Wanderer

I got a history of giving speeches
Riddled with sophisticated rhythms
So vicious it makes beginners weep
Even if they took my wisdom teeth
See, My wisdom’s higher
Couldn’t steal it with a guilloutine

We were born from one entity
And this battle will rage endlessly
Is really one of us bigger
When we can’t realize there’s not one winner?

These visions are larger than they appear
And small enough to not seem real
And somehow I couldn’t see clearer
The man we’re fearing is the man in the mirror

The whole globe is a masquerade
Faces painted with shapes in a whack parade
So when actors are staging a mass charade
It seems natural and that’s how it has to stay

Ayy
Never let it go
I won’t let the sun go down until I say so
Yo
I can’t be found on a sunny day
I leave my moody blues with the moon and I run away

When I was little I could break down
Spitting sick since I was six spread the plague 'round the playground
I’m in a new phase now past the break outs and rain clouds looking for my next big pay out

I confuse a waitress when I tell one
My style’s so rare, but it’s so well done
See, you’re off and on but we’re often awesome
We go so hard we go soft

It’s a town for the gentle
Housing a tower of terror
So come around and you’ll accidentally encounter an error
No one’s allowed to protect you without power to detect us
Now, either one will make it out or we are going down together

And I’ll try to be pithy for the sake of persiology
You never know, I could reintroduce a kind of uncouth
Letter combination to society and then the world ends
Cause they can’t pronounce it properly

Stick the auxiliary into me and watch the
Entire room’s IQ’s rise exponentially
Not even a modicum of onomatopoeia’s even needed
Just to hear scores zoom, they’ll remember me

As a Star Rapper, ‘cause I don’t miss, majesty
Space yourselves! for this galactic travesty
When I open the lid, pour some history in, and then scan this beat like a Facts Machine!

Wake up
Another day of my self chronicle

Two ways to get up out of bed
But neither logical

A trial of dichotomy I bottle up
Maybe I should lay and just pray for a deus ex machina

Intellectually I want to be a bigger man
But viscerally I want to be a kid again
And sometimes you gotta pay for the view like a fork in the road at a table for the new

Kids on the block
Spitting pop rocks
Thinking outside the box like it’s hopscotch
Sipping java script like hot chocolate
Just put the cartridge in and hit start

‘Cause there's no rapper who could
Hold a candle to the
Jolly old fella who arose such a clatter
On the microphone, l don’t need to light no match
For this world to turn to Ash

Bring it all to the table
‘Cause your seat may be gone later
Thank the baker
Do a couple favors for your neighbor
And next time don’t be a stranger

A waste of cake is a waste of time
Get that measuring tape away from that waist of mine
Another day another sunrise
So, I’ll see you on the other side