The Beatles’ Christmas Record

[Paul] Hoo!

[All]
Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen (Hoo!)
As the slow ray round about
Deep and crisp and crispy
Brightly show the boot last night
On the mosty cruel
Henry Hall and David Lloyd
Betty Grable too

[John] Hello, this is John, speaking with his voice. (Huh!) We're all very happy to be able to talk to you like this on this little bit of plastic. This record reaches you at the end of a really gear year for us, and it's all due to you. When we made our first record on Parlophone towards the end of 1962, we hoped everybody would like what had already been our type of music for several years already, but we had no idea of all the gear things in store for us. It all happened really when Please Please Me became a number one hit, and after that, well cor' the blimeys, heave the mo'! Our biggest thrill of the year, well, I suppose it must have been topping the bill at the London Palladium and then, only a couple of days later, being invited to take part in The Royal Variety Show

[All] (whistling)

[John] This time last year, we were all dead chuffed because "Love Me Do" got into the top twenty, and we can't believe really that so many things have happened in between already! Just before I pass you over to Paul, (Arf-arf! Arf-arf!) I'd like to say thank you to all the Beatle people who have written to me during the year and everyone who sent gifts and cards for my birthday, which I'm trying to forget, in October. (Huh!) I'd like to reply personally to everyone, but I just haven't enough pens. In the meantime:

Garry Crimble to you
Garry Mimble to you
Getty Bable, dear Christmas
Happy Birthday me too

[Paul] This is Paul here. Everything that John said goes for me too, 'specially the bit about birthday cards and the parcels, 'cause all our homes and offices got stacks of mail last June, ow! Ha! Ha! When it was my birthday. Anyway, we're all dead pleased by the way you've treated us in 1963, and we'll try to do everything we can to please you with the type of songs we write and record next year. Oh yeah, somebody asked us if we still like Jelly Babies. Well! We used to like them, in fact we loved them and said so in one of the papers, you see. Ever since then, we've been getting them in boxes, packets and crates. Anyway, we've gone right off Jelly Babies, you see, but we still like peppermint creams and chocolate drops and dolly mixtures and all that sort of thing

[John] Yes! Yes! Oh yes!

[Paul] Well, lots of people asked us what we enjoy best, you see, concerts and television or recording? We like doing stage shows 'cause it's, you know, it's great to hear an audience enjoying themselves. But the thing we like best, I think so anyway, is going into the recording studio...

[John] Yes, we enjoy that very kindly!

[Paul] ...to make new records, which is what we've been doing all day before we started on this special message. Well, eh, what we like to hear most is one of our songs, you know, taking shape in a recording studio, ah, one of the ones what John and I have written, and then listening to the tapes afterwards to hear how it all worked out, you see. Well, I'm running over my time, and people are telling me to stop and Ringo...

[All] Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop shouting, those animals!

[Paul] ...so I'll finish off now with it wishing everyone Happy Crimble and a Merry New Year and especially all the ones who paid the subscription

[John] Ja, das wird uns danke schon
Und denn gruss von even
Ja, denn gruss von even schon
Ja, das wird wunderschon, boy
Danke schon

Ja, Ringo!

Hello, Ringo here
As you know I was the last member to join The Beatles. I started to play drums in the group 1962, ha-ha-ha! Have been in a couple of other groups...

(Oh, just wish the people a merry, happy, go on, for Christmas, Christmas)

Merry, Happy New Year, and folks, Happy Christmas and may, may everything you wish be granted
(Sing, sing us Wenceslas, King Wenceslas)
King Wenceslas:

Well, good King Wenceslas looked out (Oh ho!)
On the feast of Stephen (Hey!)
When the snow was on the ground (Yeah!)
Deep and crisp and even (Oh yeah!)

Hooray!

Thank you, Ringo! Thank you, Ringo! We'll phone you! (Ha ha ha!)
I'm George Harrison. Nobody else has said anything yet about our fan club secretaries, Ann Collingham and Bettina Rose, not to mention Freda Kelly in Liverpool. (Good old Freda!) So on behalf of us all, I'd just like to say a great, big thank you to Ann, Bettina and Freda for all the hard work they've done, and we just hope you can go on pleasing you for a long time, 'cause it's gonna, 'cause it to your reaction are to our records that really matters
And I'd just like to say:

Brightly was the shone that night
Though the winter cruel
When a pork pie came inside
Gathering winter cruel

Rudolph, the red nosed reindeer (Ho!)
Had a very shiny nose (A shiny nose!)
When ev'rybody picked it...

Ha, ha, ha, ha...

Oh yeah! Oh!

Rudolph, the red nosed Ringo (Rudolph!)
Had a very shiny nose

Merry Christmas everybody!