Grouch’s Prayer

[Intro]
I just wanna know, don't you believe in God anymore?
Well, my faith is gone. To answer your question
Yes I do believe in Jesus
Yes, I do believe in God, but do I love him?

[Chorus]
I'm lost upon this voyage and I'm searching for truth
They told me to believe, but I want to see the truth
I'm tired of your lies, so now you feel my anger
How could I ever trust my soul with a stranger?

[Verse 1]
Now, dear Mr. Bigshot, let me ask you a question
Put you on the stand
Raise your right hand
I want to hear your confessions
My family is stressing out cause there's nowhere else to go
We're looking for a higher power. You dodge, just hit us low
In church they said that it was free
Your love would always be
I'm steadily giving mine, but where is yours for me?
I couldn't see it, so I stray
You took my dreams, I prayed
I wanted to get them back, but you laughed and I'm afraid
I made the wrong decision
You killed my hopes and visions
I thought you had arisen
But this is more like prison
I'm giving my all daily and maybe it's all for nothing
I never hurt anyone, so why do you keep me suffering?
I stay tough and you lay it on
Thicker and I say it's wrong
I'll play this song 'till you answer
Give you another chance to appear
Cause we dying out here. I see no light
All I ever did was care and try to do what the fuck was right

[Chorus 2x]

[Verse 2]
I trained all my life for it
I would have died for it
Man, you took it from me
Bully crummy friend
Got the nerve to say I've sinned?
I tend to feel abandoned cause you left me in the dark
The light of my life was gone and I'm searching for a spark
Sure, the mark of the beast is near
So we're all living in fear
No one holds a clear head
So people appear dead for a reason
And I'm breathing
Not even demons scare me
Is it necessary to panic?
By now I feel prepared, see
I planned it to be one way
But of course it never works
Forever quirks within the system
Am I a victim or a jerk?
With a sickened spurt of questions
Guessing without your blessing
Testing my own limits. I can feel the walls compressing
And within it I ain't shit, but to me I'm all there is
Sometimes I hate my life when I look at the next man and compare his to mine
And it is the time for me to rise, so let me
They labelled me a child of God, so help me or forget me

[Chorus 2x]

[Outro]
I don't care if you're a preacher, a priest, a nun, a rabbi, or a Buddhist monk
Many, many times during your life
You will look at your reflection in the mirror and ask yourself
'Am I a fool?'

And then, one day
You're just going to wake up and say 'fuck him'?
I'm not going to relapse
What I've experienced is closer to awakening
I didn't say 'fuck him'