No Skrrt No Service

[verse 1]
I feel like fuckin' dying alive at an Irish funeral
Soldier who just left Afghanistan a few years ago screaming at my ass like What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Qaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo
Like boy no skrrt no service
Water from the thermos
No bad non loyal bitch can earn this
So you know how rice absorbs moisture, or at least people say it does, well what if that effect was majorly multiplied? Like someone would push you into a pit of rice and you wouldn't be able to do anything but sit and watch as the surrounding grain turns red with your blood as its slowly and painfully dragged from your body. Your movement would slow and your head would hurt, as your brain is deprived of its necessities. Your heartbeat slows, not being able to keep up with the rice. Soon, your other bodily fluids are drained as well. Your mouth is so dry, everything hurts. You would scream out it agony if your mouth had any moisture left to produce coherent sounds. Outside its a silent and gruesome death, but inside you are in more pain that you will ever feel. The weight of rice keeps you trapped as you realize no matter what you did to prepare for this, you wouldn't survive. Your last breaths leave your mouth as you think your final thoughts, out of all things to die from, it had to be rice
But nope, no skrrt no service