I’m Working Retail For Christmas

I’m working retail for Christmas
Kids screaming, parents get mad
I’m working retail for Christmas
Suddenly hell don’t seem so bad

Camp outside storefronts for weeks
Gotta buy cool new things
Time to replace last year’s TV
Gotta buy cool new things

Shopping cart slams into me
No time for apologies
I’m a person with feelings
(spoken): Dude, just say “excuse me”
(spoken): Ope, I'm gonna squeeze right by ya

I’m working retail for Christmas
Kids screaming, parents get mad
I’m working retail for Christmas
Suddenly hell don’t seem so bad

Fistfight over parking space
Gotta buy cool new things
Shopping trip turns to arms race
Gotta buy cool new things

Stop reaching over me
I’ll gladly movе if you just say “please”
(spoken): Wе're out of that
(spoken): Just check the back, I know you have more
(spoken): UGH
Gotta buy cool new things

I wonder how I got here
Then it hits me
I should be singing about parties and friends
Instead of “1-2-3 pick it up pick it up”

I’m working retail for Christmas
Bank account empty and sad
I’m working retail for Christmas
Cause I play in a ska punk band