CLOSE TO YOU

[Intro]
Wanted to be close to you
Close to you
All I want is to hold you
Hold you

[Verse 1]
You keep breakin' my heart
And I let it fly, as long as you're around
Phone calls to you, I was breakin' down
Back then, should've known I should trust my doubt
I found out because of the 'net, then I lost my respect
And I started regrettin', all of that shit was facade
Hindsight hitting me like a Mike Ty' barrage
Right, left, right, left, ayy
Right, left, right
I'm really not impressed, stickin' my neck out for you
And you went and did me like that, I ain't been getting no rest
You reminded me of a time, a time where I couldn't eat
They put me on Emeset, that ain't fix my sleep
You said you wanna get married, I guess it's not that imperative
Like damn, you gotta relax, heavy words with no weight
Was considering getting a therapist, afraid to tell my parents
I don't wanna stress 'em with that, I went MIA
Keepin' my thoughts to myself, but that doesn't change the fact
One of my friends had asked me, "Should you change the way you act?"
"Givin' trust without a doubt, you should be more reserved with that"
I understand the sentiment, but my heart don't hold back
I love with no reservation, shawty (I used to pray for you)
This home need some renovation, shawty (I used to pray to God about you)
Don't you-Don't you see me?
It ain't right person, wrong time, it's just the wrong person
I got tired of all the lies, but you get my mercy
Girl, I forgive you, I've thought about it a lot
I gotta stop holding grudges, I'm just not that guy
Spent a lot of time alone, tryna balance my peace
I was into this one girl, but we barely speak

[Verse 2]
For the first time in my life, I been showin' love to me
I been workin' damn hard, I been workin' OT
Ten thousand hours
Spent it all on beats and singing melodies, yeah
Told Fonso 'bout my crush
He know I'm pessimistic, but I won't shut the fuck up 'bout her
Plus, I was a few drinks in, I forget I gotta feel shit
I'm so used to just numbin' out
I used to not have songs in the vault, I could really thumb through 'em now
I be talking 'bout some real shit
I can't smoke, 'cause I get paranoia
If I'm getting green, it ain't cherimoya
I'm tryna be my own employer, so some things, I gotta give up
Came far from the 6ix, I'm in the 31 tryna build up

[Bridge]
Wanted to be close to you (Close to you)
(Run in that, run in that fire)
(Oh, oh)
In a way, you humbled me (Brought me down)
And I know you didn't mean to, but you taught me a lesson (Lesson)
Worth more than gold
That's 'cause you damaged me, and left me on my own

[Verse 3]
I know why it went left now
I know, know
It was never meant to be from the start
I put more pain in my art, than Noah put things on his ark
This way of life is not smart
I hate when I bottle it up
I had to call my mom and bawl my eyes out
I had to call my mom and let it all out

[Outro]
You know, despite my good old struggle to lose control of myself and surrender to the chaos...
With her, I was always ready to drop everything and...just want to have fun in this miserable little world with her
But I guess I gotta let go of that too
That idealism, it's gonna be the death of you