DLC PLC

[Intro: Boogie2988]
I can't believe I cut myself filming this
That's how my DLC makes me
I'm fucking bleeding because of DLC

[Verse 1]
(Badum, badum, badum, badum)
(Badum, badum, badum, badum)
Downloadable content's a load of nonsense
I won't give them one cent
It wouldn't be conscientious
Encouraging dodgy ventures
Like when you've been robbed
Do you get your property straight back from the fences?
I want to know what the defence is
Hence this musical census
Pay attention to community consensus
To prevent this backlash of hashtags
And truly contentious lambasts, eg:
I hope you're shoving your Prothean
Up your fallopian
No wonder the planet's becoming dystopian
Draconian Napoleons invoking pandemonium
And I might be blowing my own euphonium
By quoting this
But I know I'm not the only one that's pissed
My data's trapped inside the disc
Sat in lines of script
And I have to pay to take it out
What kind of shit is this?

[Hook]
It's the DLC PLC
Where we make money selling people things that were free
Welcome to the DLC PLC
Where we charge you for things you bought previously

[Verse 2]
No need to be dishonest
The incompleted product's a piece of bollocks
So please give me the pieces of it
And leave my wallet, I need the dollars
But don't be extremely bothered
I'll probably buy the sequel of it
Cause that's the key
The reason it keeps on happening, it's obvious
If you pay them quids they take the piss
And get away with it
Until they're pinching all your paper
Like a paperclip
And what would our forefathers
Have thought of horse armour?
It's all rather an awful palava
Perhaps I should make a call and talk to Obama
You're causing drama
And according to the laws of karma
Stir the water, sure enough
Of course you'll taunt the poor piranhas
So try to pull my jaws apart
I'm sure you can't
I'm sinking my teeth into the greed
Inherently buried in DLC things
Hidden fees and prices surprising me like bee stings
Is it any wonder we punters are seething

[Hook]
At the DLC PLC
Where we make money selling people things that were free
Welcome to DLC PLC
Where we charge you for things you bought previously

[Bridge]
I'm sorry, but Verse 3 is only available in the Premium version of this song
If you would like to acquire the Premium version, then please bend over with your VISA, American Express or MasterCard lodged tightly between your buttocks
Thank you for your continuing loyalty from everybody

[Hook]
At the DLC PLC
Where we make money selling people things that were free
Welcome to DLC PLC
Where we charge you for things you bought previously

The DLC PLC
The DLC PLC

[Outro]
Downloadable content... what is it?
What use does it have? What function does it serve?
I mean, obviously I know the answer
But it's a sort of rhetorical question, I suppose
So maybe you think about it whether
Whether it's good for the gaming community
Whether it's good for the industry
What your thoughts about it are
I'm very keen to know!