Take it off Petronella!

She is all the rage of the German stage
Playing Wiedekind or Goethe
We all love her so she plays SRO
So the critic's barbs don't hurt her
It's really a phenomenon
When she comes on all cares are gone
She bares her soul and shoulder
We gasp and pant and start to chant

'Take it off, Petronella, take it off
Of your talents we're adoring
But we find the theatre boring
If you don't want us to yawn or snore or cough
Take it off, Petronella, take it off'

I act Maeterlink wearing only mink
And I play Iphegenia
Wearing not a swatch just a diamond watch
And a glittering tiara
I bring classics to the present tense
With elegance and reverence
And you'll love my love's labour
My Juliet's the best you'll get

As my costumes get less and lesser
They think I'm quite the dresser
And of course they admire my scholarship
When I strip, don't you fellas? when I strip

When the curtain's down she goes on the town
On the arm of her rich lover
Then he sees her home, her hands start to roam
But he hovers just above her
You'll please me more than you can know
By giving me a second show
Your bare flesh in the moonlight
Will help to make my juices flow

'Strip for me, Petronella, strip for me
Release your body from its torments
I want my own private performance
In the morning we'll go on a shopping spree
But tonight, Petronella, strip for me
Strip for me, Petronella, strip for me'