One Big (Happy) Family

[Verse 1]
The English hate the Irish
And the Arabs hate the Jew
The whole world's got its black man in a pinch
The cowboys hate the Indians
And the Chinese hate 'em too
The French hate everyone
That's just part of being French

[Verse 2]
Now your Spaniard loves a bullfight (toro!)
Your Russian loves a trial
Italians love His Holiness
Because he dresses real snappy
And the Germans like a good old fashioned war
Every once in a while
And we Americans, we love everyone
See we keep the whole world laughing

[Chorus]
Yes we're just one big happy family 'neath the sun
All full of you and me and he and she and it and everyone
Gosh it's a goofy loony place that we're coming from
We call it heaven
Please take your shoes off
Don't ask no questions
Are you having fun?
Well think about this then

[Verse]
The thin ones laugh at fat ones
And the smart ones laugh at fools, yeah
Everyone thinks that somebody else is funny
Ah-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha!
The hot laugh at the cold
The old are laughing at the new
And six-gun Yassir and Bokassa and the Rockefellers
You know that they laugh at everybody

[Chorus - Outro]
Still it's just one big happy family 'neath the sun
It's all full of you and me and he and she and it and everyone
Ah it's a wacky zany place we're coming from
Me, I ain't laughin'
In fact I'm leavin'
You keep the car dear
I still don't need it
Don't tell the children
Don't tell the Germans
Don't tell the Rockefellers
Don't tell no one
No one
Ah!