Song: questions
Subject matter: a girl
Est: 2018
Too much on my mind at the time I was fine
Until i made the call you were busy you had to decline
**too much is already on your mind to begin with but you were fine until this girl came along, but you decided to still take a chance. however, you were shut down. **
Took a couple lines I paid a couple fines the last couple times i had to unwind
I don’t think this is real but i’m just gonna
Play along til it breaks or it works
**couple lines, referring to whatever drug of choice to get over or get past your thoughts. you’ll test the waters with this girl to see if it’ll be worth going through hell in a hand basket and she accepts you or if it’ll break the friendship/relationship (or you as a person) completely. **
I’m a catalyst to the activists i’m trying to act a wish i wanna to see you twist i want a piece of this
I want this to work, i’m taking the time to do what i can to make you convert
I want you to think about me the way that i think about you it’s a curse, got your footprints on my mind but you’re running away from the love i disperse
**you acting as a catalyst, you’re wanting to be the change for this girl and she’s the activist because she herself is provoking a change in you,which is your feelings. she is making you feel something. you’re doing everything in your power to make her see what you feel for her however she herself has put on a curse on you (intentional or not) because you’re willing to inflict pain on yourself for her, you can’t help but still think there could be something so you’re going to keep trying regardless of how many times you’re pushed away**
I’m trying too hard i wanna give up but i’m keeping it charge, got my heart hella large
Keeping my distance i don’t wanna barge, make you wanna discharge the feelings i’m throwing to you lock me away show me off like a zoo
**youre now realizing you’re having to do too much for her affection without getting even an iota of the same in return, but to still remain loyal you keep up your efforts but you try to see if pulling back changes anything. you think maybe you’re overwhelming her and that’s why she’s pushing away.**
**/the zoo itself
Animals are locked up in cages for people to look at for enjoyment,but it could be safe to say the animals aren’t enjoying it.**
*you or your feelings are the animals, the cage is your heart and she is on the outside getting the enjoyment, whether she wants you romantically or not, she could be liking the attention. or her enjoyment can just be her being blissfully unaware of what’s going on inside of you in regards to her so her, life is good and everyone is happy. she’s continuing to live day to day life as are you, but more of a hollowed out version, (you’re there but you’re not....you’re empty).*
Hardly a thought or a mention to you, 15 minute conversations meaning the world to me but it ain’t shit to you
I’d do anything to be the one but you brush me off leave me stuck in a loop
*you feel as if she doesn’t think about you. conversations, pertaining to either on the phone or in person meaning everything to you because she is everything to you, so you’re taking in every thing she’s saying verbally but on a deeper level. as well as her physical features. everything on a person you feelings for heightens while having conversation. 15 minutes can feel like hours with someone you like or maybe even love. talking to her can make you feel as if you’re in a house of mirrors, she’s in the middle and all you see is her, different shades of her. her talking to you however could be as if she’s looking at a one way mirror with you standing in the back, in the mirror she sees herself and you, but she can only see you from a distance=her keeping her distance between herself and your feelings*
Leave me questioning how without a clue, leave me questioning what i gotta do, leave me questioning what i gotta prove
**youre wondering what happened, what more could you of done, or should you of done something different. you’re still taking the blame for how things have played out. you feel you’ve either done all you can and it hasn’t worked or that there is still something you missed