Don’t Marry Me

[SAMMY FONG]
You are young and beautiful
Sweet as the breath of May
Earnestly I speak to you
Weigh every word I say

If you wanna have a rosy future
And be happy as a honeybee
With a husband who will always love you, baby
Don't marry me

If you want a man you can depend on
I can absolutely guarantee
I will never fail to disappoint you, baby
Don't marry me

I eat litchi nuts and cookies in bed
And I fill the bed with nutshells and crumbs
I have irritating habits you'll dread
Like the way I have of cracking my thumbs

My grandpa was a big game hunter
He met Grandma swinging on a tree
If you wanna have attractive children, baby
Don't marry me

[Dance break.]

[MEI LI]
I would like to see my sons and daughters
Sliding up and down their father's knee

[SAMMY FONG]
They'll get splinters in their little fannies, cookie
Don't marry me

I'm devoted to my dear old mama
And if you and Mama disagree
I would always side with her against you, schnookie
Don't marry me

[MEI LI]
I would always like to know where you go
I don't like a man to keep me in doubt

[SAMMY FONG]
Honey, that's a thing that's easy to know
You will always know where I am, I'm out!

I am talking like a Chinese uncle
I'm as serious as I can be
I am saying this because I love you, darling
Don't marry me!

Marry a dope
Innocent and gaga
Marry a Khan
Ali or the Aga
Marry for money
Or marry for free
But don't marry me!