Denial of an Eating Disorder/Symptoms of a Problem

Reading poems by Blythe Baird
Watching "eating disorder short films" and scrolling through pictures of past body checks and saved diets,
Made with starvation in mind.
Not needing to search in order to find loads of photos capturing the bodies of models and everyday people skinnier, thinner, better, than me
Because "if only I looked like them right?"
I do not need to look to find the constant motivation to fuel this disorder I do not have
Because no amount of social media promoting this disorder will ever compare to the raw reality of seeing my bеst friend lose weight or a casual commеnt about calories or health around the table.
Nothing will motivate me more than simply seeing myself in the mirror.